mrvelocipede: (Default)
Dear guy sitting next to us on the airplane,

Reading a book is (as far as I know) one of the universally-accepted signals that one does not wish to engage in conversation while on public transportation. It is a way of indicating to you that your ceaseless barrage of prying questions is unwelcome, boring, and rude. I bring books with me on the airplane both as a pleasant way of passing the time, and as a method of indicating that I would rather be left alone, without having to go to the trouble of explaining to you that I would rather not tell you my personal history, level of education, field(s) of interest, political and religious beliefs, or sports-team affiliations. I am made especially unhappy if I am forced into the position of having to tell you in so many words that I don't want to answer your questions.

You are likely to take offense at such a bald statement. No matter how these interactions are handled, your persistent refusal to be politely—or, eventually, rudely—brushed off makes our time on this airplane even more uncomfortable than it would otherwise be.

Please, in the future, for the sake of those introverts you may encounter in your travels, LEARN TO TAKE A FUCKING HINT.

Thanking you in advance.

No love,
Mr. Velocipede

P.S. Your screaming child is not helping matters significantly.

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mrvelocipede

June 2011

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